May 07 2009

Being handed 50 million receipts with your change!

Published by at 3:05 am under Why?!?


You know what I’m talking about right? You go to 7-11 to buy some beef jerky, a 2-liter of Extreme Mountain Dew and the latest issue of Juggs and when the grumpy clerk hands you your change he also hands you 15 receipts, rendering your hands useless. You’ve got the bag of porn in one hand, your open wallet in the other, and now you have to figure out how to hold dollar bills, a bunch of dimes and 40 feet of receipts. The stress builds, because after all this is a convenience store and the fact that you are paralyzed by your inability to handle all this shit at the same time is becoming very inconvenient to the growing line behind you. You panic and your brow begins to sweat. Holy shit, why is this happening to you, WHY? You fall to the floor and cry in the fetal position. Right? At least that’s what I do.

Is it too much to ask for them to hand me my bills first, followed by my coins after the bills are tucked in the wallet and THEN my receipt? Actually, just put the receipt in the bag. Am I alone in my thinking here?

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16 comments so far

16 comments to “Being handed 50 million receipts with your change!”

  1. Ferninjaon 07 May 2009 at 5:58 am


    Haha, well done listsmith.

    I always fucking hated that, and when they put your change ON your bills. WTF good is that I just have to seperate it to put it away. half the time I dont even want change anyways.

  2. Saraon 07 May 2009 at 6:09 am

    “First”? what is this Perez Hilton?

    I’ve asked them to just pitch the receipt and I get attitude. “Hey I took all the trouble to tear this and YOUR GONNA TAKE IT!”
    I wasnt planning on contesting my purchase of a jug of tequila and a pack of smokes for my husband. Maybe I can use them as a tax write off. I need this booze and my hubby needs his ciggs to handle the current economic recesion. Its our bail out.

  3. neishon 07 May 2009 at 8:03 am

    Well it’s called a counter and they have it right in front of you if you need to take a moment to organize your purse.

    Actually though, I find it really fucking anoying when the cashier puts the bills and then the change in my hand. I don’t like that >.>

  4. icecycle66on 07 May 2009 at 8:50 am

    I too used to curl up at the end of the candy rack and sob my heart to dehydration when jackass cashiers would do the “Here is a pile of change and a bunch of trash for you tor throw away” routine. I have since learned that it much better reciprocate the jester.

    Let them put the bills in you hand, then when they toss 9 pennies and a nickel on top of that, just let it slide off and clang all over the counter. They usually feel obligated to “help” you and pick up all the change. That gives you time to properly stow your big bills, like the Lincolns. So you make them hand you the change again and you toss it in your pocket while they tear the receipt. Take that from them, crumple it up and toss it at the nearest trashcan inside, intentionally miss; that way they have to deal with it later, and they remember the pain you have caused them.

    There is a science to my hate.

  5. rachelon 07 May 2009 at 9:12 am

    the grocery store is worse. especially when you are buying 150 bucks worth of family groceries for a week. the receipt NEVER ends. then there are four other piece of shit papers that have coupons and contests. i blame the republicans. they are killing trees, warming the globe and slowly rendering me insane.

  6. You Just Made My List!on 07 May 2009 at 9:22 am

    Wow, I was worried nobody would know what I was talking about. I was expecting comments like “this is dumb, you’re slipping listy, blah blah blah.”

  7. icecycle66on 07 May 2009 at 9:58 am

    You are slipping. Into the endless depths of mans’ dark sorrowful, stupid mind; being weighed down by the incompetent morons, and idiots of the world. They are bearing on your beautiful soul with their hapless actions and disregard for the sanctity of not being a damn fool.

    I have a headache and don’t feel like being at work. I need to go be mean to the slow guy who works at Popeye’s. That should make me feel better.

  8. You Just Made My List!on 07 May 2009 at 10:08 am

    Mmmmmmmm, Popeye’s. I have a hangover and that sounds SO good right now.

  9. SanFranon 07 May 2009 at 12:05 pm

    Sort of on-topic, and a serious pain in my ass is at the ice cream stand… For those living in New England, you’ll know what I’m talking about: New England takes ice cream VERY seriously, and as a result, when you order a small cone from say, Kimball Farms northwest of Boston, you have, basically, a meal for six Sally Struthers.

    here’s the problem though: they always take your order, and then get the ice cream cones… and THEN ring you up… So you have this melting mess in one hand, your wallet in the other, and it really is a tough balancing act. Why not take the order, ring you up, and THEN bring the goods? WHY!!!!!!

    Anybody been to Kimball Farms? I miss them. Can’t find ice cream worth a damn out here. Buttercrunch rules.

  10. Xinaon 07 May 2009 at 1:08 pm

    Listy, think about it. It really is too much to ask and you know it.

  11. munchieson 07 May 2009 at 1:50 pm

    Who the hell uses cash anymore anyways?

  12. SanFranon 07 May 2009 at 4:26 pm

    Cash is king, munchies… always has been, always will be…

  13. Tommy Rocheon 07 May 2009 at 8:03 pm

    Since I quit smoking I never find myself in a convienience store FUCK. I hate the word convieniece. I have no idea how to spell it will never learn. I suck at life and how ironic is it that that word would be giving me so much trouble. I’m gonna go kill myself.

    I mean…Yeah it seems those working a cash register never had the luxury of paying for anything with cash or are too stupid to remember that that shit is annoying…god i’m boring myself with this post the end

  14. CreatureofHabiton 08 May 2009 at 6:24 am

    I agree Rachel – that receipt from the grocery is 16 feet long. It kills me. The rest of the world is moving toward “paperless”, but not the grocery story. Not only is my receipt 16 feet long, but they print out this other “coupon receipt” that is about 12 feet long full of shit I would never buy. Why do they do it???

    As for Ice cream San Fran, I’m all about Christina’s on Cambridge street (in cambridge). Sweet Jesus it’s good. The line is down the street, but it’s worth it. And they totally give you your cone, THEN ring you up. Assholes! That’s why I get the quart to go. 😉

  15. CreatureofHabiton 08 May 2009 at 6:25 am

    Store. Not Story.

  16. Canaduckon 03 Dec 2010 at 4:58 pm

    I worked in retail for a few years and I have to say that as a cashier, handing over the receipt was always a bit of a gamble. Some people would get mad when you handed them the receipt with their money, some people wouldn’t. Some wanted the receipt in the bag, some didn’t. Some wanted you to hold the receipt like a jerk while they put their money away. You can ask the customer what they’d like you do with the receipt, but some people hate that and would get snippy and irate.

    The point is that when you’re a cashier trying to get rid of a goddamn receipt so you can get to the next customer, you can’t really win. Either way you’re going to have customers pissed off at you, like icecycle66 who for some reason is convinced that the miserable, minimum wage cashier has anything to do with all the company’s stupid policies or can even affect them in any way.