Aug 28 2008

People who say “had went”

Published by at 3:03 am under I Don't Get It,Why?!?

I watch a lot of People’s Court and the biggest crime you will see is the murder of the English language. This is not a rant against People’s Court however. I love People’s Court. I want to marry People’s Court. People’s Court is the greatest achievement mankind has known.

My complaint is not specifically with people who appear on TV courtroom shows, or this lovely couple to the left (God help us), it’s really about anyone who says “had went.” For example “I had went to 7-11 to buy my old lady a panty rose when I ran into my parole officer.” Here’s the way this works, just say “I WENT to 7-11…” or if you really want to impress people with extra words you can say “I had GONE…” OK? Simple enough right?

Here’s another odd grammatical phenomenon that seems to be spreading. More and more I keep hearing people using the word “whenever” in place of “when.” What the fuck? Stop it! Someone will say “Whenever I went to buy some crystal meth I realized I left my money in my other overalls.” NO NO NO! It should simply be “WHEN I went to buy some crystal meth…”

I just realized there must be people who say “WHENEVER I HAD WENT to buy some crystal meth…” I hate these people.

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15 comments so far

15 comments to “People who say “had went””

  1. guilty noodleson 28 Aug 2008 at 12:34 pm

    Whenever I had went to, I laugh so hard, crystal meth comes spewing out of my nose.

    Except for your “white people hanging from hooks” post. That made me want to OD.

  2. deadlytoqueon 28 Aug 2008 at 1:19 pm

    The problem with words like “whenever” and “whom” is that most people have no idea how they are meant to be used, and think they are just fancy versions of common words, so they used them whenever they want to sound formal. Sadly, that just means anyone who does know how to use those words gets twitchy in their presence.

    I used to know a guy who would use “per se” instead of “say” if he was giving an example. “The animals of Africa, per se elephants, are well-adapted to living in grasslands.”

  3. You Just Made My List!on 28 Aug 2008 at 1:51 pm

    deadlytoque – the “per se” thing is crazy! I love that he probably thought he sounded so intelligent. I used to work with a guy who didn’t understand the concept behind “FYI” and would often say “For your FYI.”

    The world is ending.

  4. bison33on 28 Aug 2008 at 4:21 pm

    I hate it when people misuse air quotes; like for WHOLE SENTENCES, or comepletely out of context.
    sucks major ass, because I no longer hear anything else that they say thereafter.

  5. Kristyon 28 Aug 2008 at 5:21 pm

    I hope pictures of the half naked pregnant chick falls under some kind of stupid heading like “I hate it when pregnant chicks pose half naked because they still think they look hot” Or some crap.

  6. You Just Made My List!on 28 Aug 2008 at 5:36 pm

    But Kristy, look at the love these two have for each other. That is one lucky child!

  7. Balzacon 28 Aug 2008 at 9:10 pm

    Where on earth did you find that photo?

  8. You Just Made My List!on 29 Aug 2008 at 1:22 am

    Balzac, the photo came right from my dreams. My beautiful wonderful dreams.

  9. deadlytoqueon 29 Aug 2008 at 12:24 pm

    The fact that the bro (you can tell he’s a bro despite not being able to see the popped collar. You can sense it. Phantom popped collar!) is grabbing her ass, and yet the picture is in soft-focus is what really sells it for me.

    “Yo, dudes, I want some totally romantic grab-ass all up ins! Can I get a high-five!”

  10. You Just Made My List!on 29 Aug 2008 at 12:34 pm

    deadlytoque, this guy is just THAT sexual, he can’t help himself. I wouldn’t be surprised if that girl wasn’t pregnant when they started the photo shoot. He probably knocked her up right through their jeans.

    I wonder if their parents put this photo on their fridge.

  11. Sarahon 02 Nov 2008 at 9:59 pm

    Ain’t that da truth. Really though, I live in Ohio and I pride myself on perfect grammar. I’m sorry, it’s just the way I was raised. AND I HEAR THIS SHIT ALL THE TIME!! It’s also one of my pet peeves and it’s nice to know other people rant about it from time to time.

  12. tewkewlon 24 Mar 2012 at 11:58 am

    you guys are acting as if this is not an ebonics phenomenon. this is purely the result of black grammar and its infiltration into the larger population. I FREAKIN HATE “HAD WENT”…!!! I also hate “have went”. Wha??? i have is present, went is past. what? anytime i hear a “had went”. the person just loses all credibility. this is on the same level as AXE for ask. AXE is even worse because so many “main stream” blacks are saying it. I hope to God that Had Went doesn’t make it this main stream. Even ivy educated blacks are saying AXE. dear God, help us.

  13. You Just Made My List!on 24 Mar 2012 at 2:09 pm

    Tewstupid – Wow, are you kidding me? Take your dumb-ass racist theories to another website, you fucking tool.

    By the way, jackass, check your own piss-poor grammar before you start spouting off your rants about the English language. You LITERALLY have a grammatical error in EVERY sentence except one. I count at least 17 blatant mistakes in your attempt at proving your superior intelligence.

    God help us? Yes, God help us from people like you. There is nothing I hate more than ignorance, because it holds us all back. I have to live in a world unable to achieve its full potential because people like you weigh it down like a fucking anchor. You drag us all down and hold us back with your half-witted bullshit. I have to be twice as smart to make up for you, and honestly, I’m tired of picking up your slack. As a civilization we have to waste all of our valuable time dealing with assholes like you when we could be doing greater things. It’s like trying to get a large group of young kids to cross the street together but 3 of the kids are acting like brats preventing the entire group from moving forward. Everyone suffers and nothing is accomplished.

    You are a sad, small-minded person. Take your racist bullshit to another pathetic website where you can feel safe with other miserable fucks who don’t know basic 3rd grade grammar.

    Grow up.

  14. tewkewlon 03 Apr 2012 at 11:47 am

    another denier. who gives a crap about whether or not I am writing a thesis paper or not. you have obviously missed the entire point of the response. i am neither small minded or sad. I call it lilke it is. i hate PC. I hate people beating around the bush. I hate white guilt. you have no problem posting a picture of a supposed “redneck” couple and dumping this all on stupid white folks. and then when someone mentions this is a black problem, you go postal. give me a break. you are an uber hypocrite of the highest order.

  15. You Just Made My List!on 03 Apr 2012 at 2:13 pm

    Trying to explain to an idiot why they are an idiot is like trying to explain to a wall why it is a wall, but here goes!

    Let’s start with your “I hate PC” nonsense. Are you really dumb enough to think ANYTHING about this website is PC? Not to mention, there’s nothing “PC” about not being a racist asshole. Political correctness has nothing to do with it, I’m just not a small-minded dolt.

    Who says that couple in the photo are rednecks? I never made that claim. So there’s another simple thing you got wrong. Just because some people have a more highly evolved opinion of race does not make them sufferers of “white guilt.”

    You want to talk about hypocrisy? Is there any greater poetic justice than the fact that you are ranting against the grammar of black people and your own ramblings are fucking FILLED with basic grammatical errors? Let’s see, what do you call a person who thinks they don’t have to follow the same rules they demand for others? Is it hypocrite?