Sep 08 2008

Hole in the Wall!

Published by at 2:00 am under I Don't Get It,Sucky TV,Why?!?

“It’s time to face the hole!” Holy shit, it’s the end of the fucking God damn mother fucking world!

Have you seen the Mike Judge movie “Idiocracy” in which Luke Wilson accidentally travels 500 years into the future? Turns out society has been so dumbed-down that Wilson is now the smartest person on the planet. In this film the number one show on television is called “Ow My Balls” which consists solely of a man repeatedly getting hit in the balls. Turns out we don’t need to travel 500 years into the future thanks to Fox TV’s newest reality show “Hole in the Wall.” Thanks Fox, keep up the good work!

I’m sure you have seen the Japanese game show clip on YouTube where this concept originated. In the clip, a sad human who was once a tiny baby filled with promise is reduced to trying to fit through a hole in a wall. That’s the entire concept! THIS IS A PRIME TIME TV SHOW! No wonder most Americans can tell you exactly how many times Britney Spears has flashed her nasty beav but could not find Iraq on a map.

I saw the Japanese clips online just like everyone else and was mildly amused for about 2 nimutes but I just made the mistake of watching the full 30 minute version on Fox and now I want to set my face on fire. I had to use wires to force my eyes open like in “A Clockwork Orange.”

I think about my grandfather who fought in WWII and I wonder what he would say if he was around to see the important things he fought for, like “Hole in the Wall.” I know what his reaction would be, a swift kick to my balls. Ow my balls, ow my balls indeed.

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9 comments so far

9 comments to “Hole in the Wall!”

  1. Creature of Habiton 08 Sep 2008 at 8:26 am

    Well said.

    It’s funny, Idiocracy is not as funny to me with election’08 in the background. It’s more prophetic than anything. I guess that makes it more of a horror flick in my book.

  2. You Just Made My List!on 08 Sep 2008 at 9:49 am

    I agree, watching that movie actually made me kind of sad because it did not seem like 500 years away. I mean, there are people who own Nickleback CDs. These people are walking around on the same planet as us and breath the same air. There is no god.

  3. rxon 08 Sep 2008 at 12:58 pm

    that’s exactly what came to mind when i saw the ad for this show too!

    i also agree with creature of habit. it’s all starting to look a bit too real.

  4. Elpinon 08 Sep 2008 at 1:31 pm

    I almost thought this as another reason for other people to think Americans are stupid, but then (I kid you not) a commercial came on and guess what: the same show is coming to Norway. So I guess we’re all in the same boat now.

  5. deadlytoqueon 08 Sep 2008 at 1:50 pm

    This is a -whole show-? I thought it was just a segment of one of those “here’s 10 different humiliating events” shows. But a whole show? BY ITSELF? My brain just popped.

    In the interests of full disclosure, I bought a Nickelback CD. But this was in the mid-90s, when they were still a “local band making it big” (they are from a small town about 50km from here) and before they became the most overplayed and awful thing on the radio. I even saw them as an opener, when they were small-time. I sold the CD before the year was out, right after “Leader of Men” got into video rotation, and by the time “This is how you remind me” was getting play, I was already out.

  6. You Just Made My List!on 08 Sep 2008 at 3:43 pm

    Yes, this is a whole show about holes. Holes in walls and the assholes who try to fit through them. Damn, that was a good line, why didn’t I think of it while writing the post last night?

    Deadlytoque, I am touched that you feel safe enough in this venue to admit to your Nickleback past. It sounds like you have worked through that brief bump in the road and are now living a clean, Nickleback-free life. I am proud of you!

  7. deathon 08 Sep 2008 at 6:50 pm

    This show premiered in Australia on Channel 9 about a month ago. I will admit that I watched it, how ever I too was expecting more than just a foam wall with a hole in it and fat people in silly suits trying to fit through that hole, I thought at the very least it’d be like “wipeout” or something that has different tasks for people to hurt them selves doing…I was mistaken, I believe I lost 30 minutes of my life and about 20 points of IQ by watching that insult to human kind that I will never get back. It just provides even more proof that humans are a doomed species; survival of the fittest is now survival of the dumbest. I’m all for people hurting them selves for my entertainment, but please be a little creative about it!

  8. Mr. Kickers Sr.on 08 Sep 2008 at 8:36 pm

    Wait. So this show isn’t about glory holes? That sucks, but not in the way I wanted it too. I was hoping Fox’s very own Britt Hume was going to host. Why don’t I get to program shows at Fox? Am I too smart?

  9. You Just Made My List!on 08 Sep 2008 at 11:10 pm

    Mr. Kickers, the Fox show you are thinking of with all the cock sucking is called “The O’Reilly Factor.”