Oct 25 2010

Ambulances that have the fucking nerve to prevent me from going through a green light even though I have been waiting at the intersection for like a million years!

Published by at 3:13 am under Why?!?

ambulance at intersection, red light green light

You know, just because you are an “emergency” vehicle trying to “save someone’s life” it doesn’t mean you have the right to make me miss my turn at the green light. I mean come on, I sat there forever in a long line of cars watching the lights go from red to green, red to green, red to green until FINALLY it was my turn to sniff the sweet aroma of green light freedom. I fantasized about this moment for the last 5 minutes and even planned on changing my Facebook status to “Woo hoo, finally made it through the intersection. Thank you Mr. Green Light!” but you and your gaudy, flashy vehicle just HAD to be there at the same time and ruin everything!

Fuck you ambulance, what’s the rush? And fuck you dying person in the back of the ambulance too. What, the whole world has to bow to you as you parade around the city in that kickass adjustable bed like some big shot? “Oooooo, look at me, I’m Donald Trump.” Maybe I would like someone to drive my lazy ass around, ever think of that? Selfish prick.

I hope you know I’m secretly hoping you die. Yeah that’s right, you make me miss the first 2 minutes of “The Biggest Loser” and I pray for your death. Seems totally fair and rational to me. You inconvenience me, so I hope you are inconvenienced by an exploding heart.

Ahhhhh, that feels much better.

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13 comments so far

13 comments to “Ambulances that have the fucking nerve to prevent me from going through a green light even though I have been waiting at the intersection for like a million years!”

  1. Jeffon 25 Oct 2010 at 7:58 am

    I’m crying rivers. What about people who ‘block the box’?

    You’re ready to go and someone slides in all perpendicular an’ shit and stops you dead. What can you do? Honking don’t help. They all just look forward like nuthins wrong.

    I think there should be extrajudicial punishment for people who do that. Guantanamo is too good for them.

  2. You Just Made My List!on 25 Oct 2010 at 8:54 am

    Jeff – That is a crime so horrible I don’t even want to think about it. Those people are worse than Hitler.

  3. saraon 25 Oct 2010 at 1:44 pm

    Keep rotten food in your car for this purpose. I got a chick reeeeeeal good with a melted goey brownie. Right on the windshield.

  4. calebon 25 Oct 2010 at 3:19 pm

    this is why i don’t own a car.

  5. saraon 25 Oct 2010 at 3:33 pm

    I hate the person who you wait patiently for to pass before you can pull out on a busy road, only to wonder why the fuck their slowing down OH THEY’RE TURNING IN TO WHERE YOU ARE! with NO TURN SIGNAL and now traffic has caught up with their dumb ass and you have to wait again

  6. SanFranon 25 Oct 2010 at 5:03 pm

    Is that a screen capture from the show Emergency! ?

    I fucking loved that show as a kid, or adult, but whatever.

  7. You Just Made My List!on 25 Oct 2010 at 5:33 pm

    SanFran – It is and it ruled.

  8. kenon 26 Oct 2010 at 11:29 am

    I wanna follow cops and ambulances with ‘their candles lit’ ( a bit of CB lingo for ya) and see how many are really on a call and not just trying to get to Long John Silvers quicker. I bet it would surprise you. I did once see a Chicago cop use his lights to go through an intersection and three blocks later, I saw him at Dunkin’ Donuts. No lie.

  9. You Just Made My List!on 26 Oct 2010 at 11:48 am

    Yeah, I have seen a lot of Chicago cops turn on the tumblers just long enough to scoot through a red light.

  10. kenon 26 Oct 2010 at 11:55 am

    Like we wouldn’t do the same thing if we were cops, too. Just sayin’. I’d shoots lots of people too, like people who block gridlocked intersections and people who prey on the elderly.

  11. Kateon 29 Oct 2010 at 7:36 pm

    While I can understand your frustration, both my parents are paramedics, so I know what it looks like from the other side as well. It’s very frustrating to them when they’re trying to get to a genuinely important call and people are too busy talking on their cell phones to pay attention. My dad is actually an operations supervisor and drives a SUV with lights, sirens, and painted to match the ambulances, and he nearly gets hit at least once a week because people can’t be bothered to pay attention.

    Yeah, it’s an inconvenience for you – but what happens if someday you’re the one needing help? What if you’re the one who’s having a medical emergency? Do you want to be in pain or die because the ambulance had to stop at the light?

    If you want to get mad at someone, get mad at the douchebags who decide that their back has hurt for three days and it’s now a dire emergency and they need an ambulance immediately, or the ones who have a headache and need an ambulance, or the ones who have a funny feeling in their big toe. No joke, my mom once ran on a guy who called the ambulance because his dog licked him, and since his dog never licked him, he must be dying. The VAST majority of calls run by paramedics are run on people who are idiots or hoping to get narcs. Get mad at them, not the paramedics who may be genuinely attempting to save someone’s life.

    Oh, and at least here, it’s illegal to use lights or sirens just to get someplace faster. Unfortunately, what cop is really going to pull another cop over for it?

  12. You Just Made My List!on 29 Oct 2010 at 8:01 pm

    Kate – If I’m the one needing help the entire world better shut down and wait for me!

  13. Kayon 16 Nov 2010 at 12:33 pm

    I was at school reading this (I finally got past all the damn firewalls) and I couldn’t keep from laughing. I HATE when that happens. I just got my license, but I hate when people do that.