Oct 29 2010

“Sexy” Halloween costumes!

Published by at 3:35 am under I Don't Get It

stupid hot sexy halloween costumes, sluts, whores

I don’t care how “gay” this makes me, but I hate it when girls do the “hot” Halloween costume thing.

“Oh, what are you dressed as?”

“I’m a hot Guantanamo Bay enemy combatant.”

“But you are just wearing lingerie.”

“I know, right? What’s a com-bat-ant?”

It’s not the “hot” aspect I dislike, it’s more about the lack of effort put into these whore outfits. I’ve spent the last two weeks driving around like an asshole looking for a wig and trying to find the exact right compressed air tank to accomplish my stupid costume and all these sluts have to do is show off their incredibly hot, young, tight bodies. Wait, I’m getting confused.

Here’s the deal, I think Halloween costumes are best when they are horribly uncomfortable to wear all night, either physically or emotionally. For example, my friend sent me these photos from a party she attended last night. This fucking genius deserves some sort of “Halloween Commitment To Excellence Award” for cutting and dying his hair and walking around as king douchebag Guy Fieri all night! This guy even purchased official Guy Fieri wristbands! That is serious commitment. This guy is my hero!

It just isn’t fair that this courageous man has to suffer so greatly while others just get to be slightly more slutty versions of themselves.

Who cares? Ignore me. OK assholes, have fun this weekend.

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14 comments so far

14 comments to ““Sexy” Halloween costumes!”

  1. Jeffon 29 Oct 2010 at 4:07 am

    heh it would actually be quite funny for someone (female, pls) to dress up as a ‘sexy ‘guy from No Country for Old Men’ or ‘sexy Guy Fieri’.

  2. Jim Joneson 29 Oct 2010 at 6:50 am

    *trembles and shutters* That guy is wearing the scariest fucking costume I have ever seen!

  3. kenon 29 Oct 2010 at 6:51 am

    Listy, the uncomfortable all night thing is right on. I went as a Blue Man back in 1999 and it was awful, you can read about it here: http://tinyurl.com/2bfagfx

    A few years later, me and my wife went as iPod silhouettes and thought we were clever and did a decent job actualizing it, until two design majors showed up in much better made costumes. We then felt like tools the rest of the night. We finally got it right the next year when a bunch of us went as the cast of The Royal Tenenbaums. It was semi-clever, we all nailed the costumes and since I went as Chas (Ben Stiller) so wearing a black, curly wig and a red Adidas tennis/track suit was a cakewalk compared to Blue Man. Hell, if I still had the tracksuit I could go as Sue Sylvester.

  4. Peteon 29 Oct 2010 at 7:55 am

    I gotta say, I love that Harry Potter costume in the picture. She can touch my muggle.

  5. Fartfaceon 29 Oct 2010 at 8:23 am

    Sexy costumes are so boring. I was thinking about being sexy Dr. Steve Brule for a little while though. I don’t think enough people would have understood.

  6. You Just Made My List!on 29 Oct 2010 at 8:49 am

    Jeff – Are you suggesting I should just pull my wiener out all night?

    Ken – Suffering = good costume. Always.

  7. saraon 29 Oct 2010 at 9:28 am

    A few years ago I went as a Hanson Brother and blacked out a tooth. I couldn’t drink regulary so as to not wear off the makeup, so I just threw back shots all night…….I guess thats not realy suffering

  8. mikeon 29 Oct 2010 at 11:47 am

    Listy, the best thing about your costume is when anybody asks, “what are you supposed to be?” you can stay in character, ignore them and pretend to kill them with your air compressor.

    I think its way hotter when hot girls dress up in completely non hot girl costumes, like full on Gorrilla suit.

  9. HMon 29 Oct 2010 at 11:56 am

    Are Japanese school girl zombies sexy? If so, I need to find a new costume.

    Halloween is amateur hour though. In the Mile High City, we have costume parties at least once a month. I have a second closet for all my costumes.

  10. saraon 29 Oct 2010 at 2:46 pm

    nothing like a tandem costume for double uncomfortable

    http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/2010/10/28/countdown-to-halloween-gnome-schooled/

  11. You Just Made My List!on 29 Oct 2010 at 5:34 pm

    Sara – Nice commitment though and good costume choice!

    Mike – I actually have a real cow killing hammer and plan on killing a few people for real tonight. Just to really sell the costume.

    HM – Depends. I will need to see photos.

  12. Fylleguppeon 30 Oct 2010 at 11:55 am

    This video pretty much sums up how I feel about this subject: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V4rUiV_Hh74
    I actually showed this to my girlfriend becuase she said she wanted to go as “sexy cat”. I can tell you she didn’t look anything like a cat! And I bet everyone who sees it is completely gonna miss the point and just admire her sexiness.
    As a man I don’t feel like putting any time or effort into my costume anymore. Because no matter how good my costume, no one is gonna notice me in a crowd of “hot devils” or w/e.

  13. You Just Made My List!on 30 Oct 2010 at 5:39 pm

    Nice! Although I have to admit, there’s something to that whole “sexy nun” thing.

  14. Moon 06 Jan 2011 at 4:44 pm

    I totally agree with this article women like this they simply put no effort into their costume and on top of that the very first picture these women constantly want to think they are “all that” and so hot. Looking at that picture they like 3 or 4 of them are good looking but they definitely are not a 10 on a scale of 1-10 there around a 6,7 maybe pushin an 8. Yeah they are cute and sexy but they aren’t “smokin hot”. A lot of these women like in the first picture get this image perception and think they are over the top hot and then they start to constantly bitch and moan about they want the hottest guy. They bitch and moan when like the slightly above average guy talks to them but yet they are also in the same category of slightly above average.

    Yup like men women (I think more women than men) do it all the time too of thinking way overly high of themselves when really they are “average” looking average as in good looking definitely cute, sexy and on the lower end of the hot pole. They are not “smokin hot”. Like the one girl in red second on the left, she’s cute and all but looks like she’s missin a tooth lol not a snaggletooth or front tooth missin but none the less a tooth missin.