Nov 10 2010

Hungry Hungry Hippos!

Published by at 3:13 am under I Don't Get It,Why?!?

hungry hungry hippos sucks

Yeah, that’s right, Hungry Hungry Hippos sucks and it’s about time someone was brave enough to say it.

This is where you get all angry and proclaim “It’s a classic!” to which I reply, “It’s a classic piece of shit, just like the Titanic was a classic ship or the Hindenburg was a totally classic way to travel.” I am so tired of being right all the time.

What good is a game with zero strategy that takes zero skill to play? You literally only need a finger and the ability to slightly move said finger. What’s that? Don’t have a finger? Fine, use your toe. I’m sorry, you don’t have arms OR legs? No biggie, use your tongue, your goal to eat balls will not be affected.

According to Wikipedia, which is never wrong, Hungry Hungry Hippos was invented by Hasbro senior game designer, Dickass McShitstain, while high on ether.

Fuck off Hungry Hungry Hippos.

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13 comments so far

13 comments to “Hungry Hungry Hippos!”

  1. kenon 10 Nov 2010 at 6:41 am

    The Simpsons (which is still on and still funny, despite what all of you haters will inevitably say) had a funny reference to HHH on this year’s Treehouse of Horrors last week. A bunch of Bart’s board games came to life but for copyright reasons, all the names were slightly changed. HHH became Ravenous, Ravenous Rhinos.

  2. noodleson 10 Nov 2010 at 7:36 am

    It’s a really frustrating game. The second you try pressing the tab, it the hippo pops out. My kids want to play it, but they can never get it to work properly.

  3. saraon 10 Nov 2010 at 8:32 am

    The Simpsons had to change the name after getting in trouble durring the Mr Plow episode, when after Homer’s tv add airs he says “And now we play the waiting game…….I’m tired of the waiting game lets play Hungry Hungry Hippos”. This applys to other TM’s like Mr Peanut is called Professor Nut. he wears a mortorboard instead of a top hat.

    I dream of a day where this information is of any use to me. What ever happened to that show Beat the Geeks?

  4. kenon 10 Nov 2010 at 9:12 am

    Sara- I too am a font of useless information. It does pay off when I participate in Trivia contests at my local watering hole.

  5. wackeyasson 10 Nov 2010 at 9:28 am

    I remember as a kid thinking that I found a gumball while at a friends place only to discover it was a marble from HHH. They still owe me money for that dental bill.

  6. 8bitheroon 10 Nov 2010 at 10:15 am

    *CLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACK*

    ~one hippo head gets stuck in the out position~

    “…this game sucks.” – My 7 year old son

  7. Paul from Saint Paulon 10 Nov 2010 at 9:32 pm

    As much as I love the HHH jingle, the lyrics convey a completely false sense of the game. There is absolutely no “aim” involved in capturing one of the balls; the hippos just slide back and forth. Maybe some gamer will correct this oversight for the now generation.

  8. Ericaon 10 Nov 2010 at 10:00 pm

    Ugh, I couldn’t agree more Listy! But even worse than the retarded game play, is having to put this fucking game together every time your 5 year old wants to play it! The genius that designed the box made it so you have to pull the hippos off to store it. From what I can remember, the original HHH game was welded together out of the box…because guaranteed my parents did not assemble this bitch every time my sister and I wanted to play it!

    Everything is shittier now…thanks China!!!!!!!!!!!

  9. BeLLon 11 Nov 2010 at 3:07 am

    Well, what about the “Cat’s Eye” game by Marx Toys? All you had to do with that was keep pushing the button for your color marbles to come out, and then finish it off with a black one for the eye. That seemed kinda fun.. at the time, I mean. :S

  10. BeLLon 11 Nov 2010 at 3:18 am

    Erica: I totally agree with you about the shittiness of Chinese made toys these days. But you gotta blame the American toy companies for that, cause they’re to cheap to pay people to make their products here. They figure why pay someone $15 an hour, when you can pay someone else $15 a WEEK to do the exact same thing!

    The other side of that is us, the consumers. Most people wouldn’t buy a $20 game or toy for triple the price, just because it was made in the USA. 🙁

    PS: Same goes for toasters.. Just try to find one that is NOT made in China.. IMPOSSIBLE! >.<

  11. You Just Made My List!on 11 Nov 2010 at 7:20 am

    Oh yeah, Cat’s Eye. I kind of remember always wanting that toy.

  12. kenon 11 Nov 2010 at 10:42 am

    Damn you BeLL, I have a Krups toaster oven I just assumed was made in Germany. It was indeed made in China. Then again I have a “British” car made in Germany.

  13. Nikkion 11 Nov 2010 at 9:26 pm

    I have honest to God NEVER played this game before, nor seen it. I’ve heard of it and I’m sure someone in my family has it, but I’ve never seen one in person.
    From what you say, I seem to be lucky.