Dec 14 2010
It’s bad enough that I spend half my day reading and writing stupid emails when I could be using that time to lie face down on the floor waiting for death, but I have to come up with appropriate titles for my little miniature novels too? Why is modern society so God-awful?
I mean what the fuck subject am I supposed to use when sending an email with bad news, for example? I don’t want to blow my wad and give all the juicy details away with a subject like “Accidentally killed a hobo today. Prob going to jail” but I also need to subtly warn the recipient that this is not your average hilarious email with a link to a rollerblader falling off a roof.
On the other hand, I can’t be too casual and write a subject that is overly optimistic, like “Hey” or “Guess what” and then whack them with the bad news of my hobo manslaughter in the body of the email.
I’m left with few options and feel obligated to go with something like “Today sucked” or “Hobo news.”
And I refuse to leave the subject blank, that’s the quitter’s way out! I don’t want to be stuck in some back and forth email exchange with my mom about hobo murder, and have “re: re: re: re: re: re: re:” staring back at me. I simply don’t think that honors the life of Flapjack Pete.
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