Dec 16 2008

Lee and Ann Marie, the eHarmony couple!

Published by at 3:00 am under Sucky TV

And the award for the least loving, most soulless, awkward kiss goes to… Lee and Ann Marie from the eHarmony commercial!

Poor Lee was going in a hundred different directions before he met Ann Marie. Lee has been saved! I practically see this couple in my sleep thanks to this never-ending ad campaign.

Call me crazy but I swear if you pay attention to the body language in this commercial Lee is not really that into Ann Marie. I’m guessing Ann Marie is the driving force in this relationship and SHE probably proposed to HIM! Lee looks like a kidnapped journalist forced to read a statement by his terrorist captors while they stand beside him with machine guns. Seriously, watch the part where they talk about knowing when you have found the right person. Ann Marie makes sure to remind Lee that “he knows” she is the one. She sticks that gun right against his face and screams “You know! You know! American rock and roll pig, YOU KNOW! Mr. McDonalds Pac Man, YOU KNOW!”

I also like that she can’t pronounce the name Lee. It’s one syllable and it rhymes with “tea” not “bay.” Ann Marie better be careful though because it sounds like Lee has a bit of an anger management problem and if you mispronounce his name he could fucking snap!


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26 comments so far

26 comments to “Lee and Ann Marie, the eHarmony couple!”

  1. Yubberson 16 Dec 2008 at 5:51 am

    What I can’t stand about these commercials is- the couples are always fucking doing the most ridiculous stuff. If my boyfriend swung me around in his arms, grabbed me by the hand and started running down the street I’d think he was on drugs.

    Shrooms, or possibly speed. He’d be on something and I’d spend the next week talking to my girlfriend at work as to what he must be up to or “on”.

    Ridiculous. And why is the bowling alley completely empty????? Where are the glowy lights?

  2. Yubberson 16 Dec 2008 at 5:52 am

    Further, why the hell can’t they show couples doing the shit they actually do? Like laying on the couch, watching reruns of That 70’s show with dirty plates and water bottles laying around. I know it’s not the most attractive scene for a commercial but at least it’s honest and relatable.

  3. Peteon 16 Dec 2008 at 8:05 am

    Holy sh#t look at the nose on that guy

  4. guilty noodleson 16 Dec 2008 at 10:14 am

    You guys crack me up!

    I have a friend who did eHarmony very briefly and met a guy she thought was great… until three months later, he snapped and the monster came out.

    Is it for religious people? Because I checked hers out and the questions asked seemed a little cooky.

  5. Davidon 16 Dec 2008 at 10:27 am

    Hi, I can’t find an email address so I’m messaging you here – sorry for being off-topic…

    I just started a new site – – and wondered if you’re interested in trading links? If you are, all you need to do is send me some traffic and your link will show up in the ‘Top Sites’ section of Link Log automatically.

    Thx 🙂

  6. LLGon 16 Dec 2008 at 2:34 pm

    OMG. This definitely belongs on your list. You know that itchy feeling that creeps up your spine when you come across something off-balance? I get that when I see this guy. He’s like the normal guy with the house, the picket fence, and the 2.5 kids; who sneaks out between the early morning hours of 2 and 5 to go strangle, decapitate, and boil the pancreas of hookers.

    It’s the same feeling I get when I past graveyards in the middle of the night and have to force a reassuring laugh… the one that sounds like “oh, haha, ghosts, ooooooh, yeah, cause THEY’RE real… haha… lalalala… i’m way too old and way too rational to believe in spooks and spirits, ahaaahaaa – hic hic hic- haaa…”

    Follow up Q: Also potentially list-worthy, people who actually say the LETTERS of O-M-G, versus those who are just too f-ing lazy to type out those painstaking four more letters.

  7. Yours Trulyon 16 Dec 2008 at 5:18 pm

    I can’t stand those commercials…”Lee” needs to get his ass kicked. Now that I think about it, Ann Marie needs to get her ass kicked too, lest you think I’m sexist.

  8. Navisionon 16 Dec 2008 at 10:06 pm

    I laughed so hard when I saw this post… mainly because of a post on a site that you link to: Fail Blog:

    E-Harmony Fail. It is just so simple and funny.. Makes me giggle.

  9. ex-stripperon 16 Dec 2008 at 10:21 pm

    after reading this I decided to investigate about the “Lee and Ann Marie” relationship on google (way too much time on my hands) and they actually have wedding photos online with Lee wiping a tear from his eye in one of the photos…

  10. You Just Made My List!on 16 Dec 2008 at 10:41 pm

    Nav – nice link, thanks!

    Stripper – I NEED TO SEE THESE PHOTOS! Link please!!!

  11. You Just Made My List!on 16 Dec 2008 at 10:44 pm

    Found it

  12. ex-stripperon 16 Dec 2008 at 11:29 pm

    enough to bring a tear to my eye … haha… he’s crying cos he realized he just said goodbye to his freedom

  13. Bobcatson 17 Dec 2008 at 5:07 pm

    I hate these people and I wish them all the unhappiness in the world…

  14. hutchon 17 Dec 2008 at 8:12 pm

    Either I just ate too much chocolate chip cookie dough…or I’m gonna be fuckin’ sick. Lee strikes me as the asswipe we all knew in college that would brag about “gettin’ 8 reps of 315” and would spend an hour doing pushups before going out.

  15. Annoyed1on 06 Jun 2009 at 12:26 pm

    This couple is FAKE. I knew “Ann Marie” looked familiar and then it hit me. She was on an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer where she played a robot named April. If you don’t agree check out Her real name is Shonda Farr. And those “wedding” photos? FAKE too!

  16. You Just Made My List!on 07 Jun 2009 at 10:40 am

    I don’t think Ann Marie is Shonda Farr. They look similar but I don’t think it’s her. Ultimately I don’t really care because I still hate her no matter what her name is.

  17. Jabberon 06 Aug 2009 at 12:05 am

    One question that crosses my mind about her. Is she passing?

  18. Mr. Mon 23 Aug 2009 at 10:30 am

    Yeah… They need to make a “real commercial” where Lee is sitting on the toilet taking a crap that would literally make the wallpaper peel…. all while the bathroom door is left open. Ann Marie gets pissed and shouts .. For God’s sake.. Can’t you shut the F*ing door ? And turn the damn exhaust fan on !!!!!!!!!!!!!

  19. rush2112on 06 Oct 2009 at 8:57 pm

    Lee–what a shifty-eyed bastard. He talks like he didn’t exhaust all eastern European mail order bride services before paying e-harmony to find Ann Marie, a complete sycophant who just wanted to make someone love her. This couple is so mired in their fake mutual obsession, it makes me wonder if e-harmony is going to come out with their e-dissonance online divorce service before Lee rips off his “sun’s out, guns out” t-shirt, succumbing to roid-rage earning his third strike which sends him to prison for life. What a complete choad.

  20. tengri_gimon 24 Nov 2009 at 5:41 pm

    E-harmony is a f-club (figure the other three letters out) according to one of my moms classmates. And its run by christians. Legal prostitution? The E in E-harmony apparently is the E in EQ remember that stupid book that came out in the 90s. Why e-harmony when you can hook up on yoville, lmao.

  21. Dutchon 31 Jan 2010 at 12:05 am

    These people drive me nuts and they seem so opposite. Anne Marie is so dramatic and Lee is such a wuss. They used to show that they had gotten married but the commercials for all the couples now never mention it, so i was looking around to see if they had all divorced, since they seem to use the same people all the time, with no one new. Too much time on my hands.

  22. Valon 28 Feb 2010 at 4:32 pm

    I’ve been trying to do a search on Ann Marie from this commercial because my friend swears she’s a porn star… Jesse Jane or something like that? For real!

  23. You Just Made My List!on 28 Feb 2010 at 4:37 pm

    Val – I would LOVE to find out Ann Marie is a porn star but I know she’s not Jesse Jane. Um… not that I have ever watched porn.

  24. sharon wheeleron 03 May 2010 at 7:19 am


  25. You Just Made My List!on 03 May 2010 at 3:54 pm

    Sharon – They all suck.

  26. Kami Williamson 29 Mar 2012 at 1:19 pm

    check out the couple in the restaurant where the girl cracks up laughing at the dude because he was raised on a farm with chickens and goats.
    Ohh thats real hilarious you simple- minded droan.
    She actually laughs at everything the guy says which shows her apparent IQ level.
    if i was the guy sitting across from the loud , retarded , laughing hyena I would leave to go to the rest room and never come back.
    she wasnt all that much to look at in the first place, but this would have been the topper.