Dec 22 2008

Ashton Kutcher and his Coolpix commercials that make me want to kill myself!


Please make it stop. I beg you to wake me from this nightmare and tell me I have been in a coma for 5 years. In a gentle, caring voice explain to me that while in my coma my brain invented an entire universe that does not actually exist. Put your hand on the side of my face and tell me this Ashton Kutcher monster existed only in my hang-gliding-accident-coma-mind and I am free now. Tell me I am free to live in a world without Ashton Kutcher. Is that you ma? I’m back ma, your little baby boy is alive!

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13 comments so far

13 comments to “Ashton Kutcher and his Coolpix commercials that make me want to kill myself!”

  1. AngrySaron 22 Dec 2008 at 7:43 am

    Oh hell yes, I hate these commercials too!!! Especially the implied notion (hmmm… very similar to the whole Michael Phelps gag fest, ugh!) that Ashton is so hot that by acting like a douchebag in these commercials it makes all these dumb women swoon over him. I hate his stupid faces, like he’s just sooooo achingly funny. Give me a break. Amen, please pinch (or smack) and wake me.

  2. Jeffon 22 Dec 2008 at 7:45 am

    Is it because he kinda reminds you of yourself?

  3. hodanon 22 Dec 2008 at 9:10 am

    worst than Ashton’s commercial is those damn sketcher commercials with only shoes of the speakers showing.UGH!

  4. You Just Made My List!on 22 Dec 2008 at 10:31 am

    Oh Jeff, how do I still manage to love you after all these years of abuse? How do any of us?

  5. guilty noodleson 22 Dec 2008 at 11:17 am

    Jeff, I was just thinking the same thing last night when I came across a coolpix commercial. I must agree, Ashton does remind me of YJMML!!!!!

  6. You Just Made My List!on 22 Dec 2008 at 11:21 am

    Why is everyone so jealous of how awesome and Ashton-like I am?

  7. SanFranon 22 Dec 2008 at 11:33 am

    Sorry for my lack of commentary as of late – me and the lovely Mrs. are in Atlanta for 10 days…

    I feel blessed that I have not seen even one of the commercials you have put on your list. My professional advice: don’t watch TV. I can’t stand advertisements anywhere, and the only ones worse than TV are radio spots. Uggh.

    Independent studies show: a reduction of TV dramatically decreases your exposure to the likes of Ashton krutcher.

    I’d also like to point out the unfortunate ad placement at the bottom of the comment page here, for yes, a nikon coolpix. Ha! Ashton I’d after you!!!

  8. SanFranon 22 Dec 2008 at 11:34 am

    Ashton IS after you, that is. Damn predictive type on the iPhone strikes again!

  9. ex-stripperon 22 Dec 2008 at 11:35 am

    ashton-like…I knew you had to be hot…

  10. munchieson 22 Dec 2008 at 2:17 pm

    You know, you’re my kind of people.

    Because you’re SO cool, I’m going to share this other blog with you, I hope it brings you as much enjoyment as it brings me:

    Fuck You, Penguin

  11. You Just Made My List!on 22 Dec 2008 at 2:27 pm

    Ex-stripper, I am very hot.

    Munchies, I just found out about that blog the other day. It’s amazing and I was actually going to write about it tonight. Good timing.

    San Fran, give up TV? That is the craziest thing I have ever heard. What are you, a terrorist?

  12. Paul in St. Paulon 22 Dec 2008 at 7:50 pm

    YJMML, you can’t touch Ashton Kutcher in smarminess. That’s not a challenge, by the way. It’s not a competition anyone should want to win.

    And that Fuck You, Penguin blog is really delightful. The fat prairie dog rant made my day. I even slapped the sloth picture on for my facebook profile photo. It’s got a much better smile than I do.

  13. Jill(not the whore bride)on 03 Oct 2009 at 9:28 pm

    I too hate these commercials. I don’t know if anyone else has noticed…but he has his little red Kabbalah bracelet on in all of them. That is what really makes me almost vomit! He’s a full on bag o’ douche…that’s a fact!