May 29 2009

This incredibly creepy banner ad!

Published by at 3:01 am under Jerks

teeth whitening

Have you seen this banner ad online yet? I see it, plus other variations, all the time and it just does not sit well with me. It makes me want to shower. My brain wants desperately to figure out which photo is “before” and which is “after” but all I see is before and more before. I have been waking up in the middle of the night, soaked in sweat, screaming “BEFORE! BEFORE!”

I did a little nosing around about this ad and the site “cathysteeth.com” that it advertises. Turns out there are about 100 variations of this “mom’s blog” all telling the same story but from the beautiful white mouths of different fake moms. Just google the following sentence and you will see what I mean…

I discovered a two-product combination that works better than anyone could have expected

I used to just hate the ad because it made me physically ill, but now I hate it because it’s just another example of people trying to scam each other. Fuck everyone. Not you though, you are my favorite.

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14 comments so far

14 comments to “This incredibly creepy banner ad!”

  1. jasonon 29 May 2009 at 6:20 am

    Now if she could just discover another money saving method of mositurizing those dry ass lips of hers! Are u serious listy? My leather boots look more supple and soft.

  2. kaotiksymphonyon 29 May 2009 at 7:15 am

    They’re almost all from my hometown…how bizarre

  3. icecycle66on 29 May 2009 at 9:05 am

    Who the shit would whiten one front tooth? Has digital film gone up in price so much that you can’t take a separate before and after pictures, but you have to take them at the same time. And furthermore, the picture on the left asks if you have yellow “teeth”. Well apparently fucking not, this person has yellow “tooth”.

  4. Tommyon 29 May 2009 at 10:58 am

    This is more like LIKE IT LISTER!!!!
    I’m so tired of these fucking ads everywhere. I only half way hate the ads on your site. I sure hope you’re getting rich from me never clicking on them. BUt these scam sites…I’m pretty sure if you are going to any of these things to solve your problems with “needing to lose 10 pounds fast” or “removing the disgusting layer of plaque from your teeth” or “Enlongate your penis to 24″” you might as well kill yourself. In fact I’d like to start my own scam site where people pay $225 for me to send them a special cure all pill. It cures whatever ailment you might have depending on which link you click. The pill will be delivered promptly containing cyanide.

  5. Great Oden's Ravenon 29 May 2009 at 11:53 am

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HowmTRIMqEQ

    Her lips are nasty and all those banners are annoying. Especially the belly fat ones. ugh

  6. SanFranon 29 May 2009 at 2:49 pm

    Nope.. haven’t seen it – Adblocker for safari is a wonderful application.

    But, holy shit that’s disturbing.

    I NEED A DRINK!

  7. hodanon 29 May 2009 at 3:36 pm

    ugh i hate those ad things too. the belly fat(with stretch marks!) ones are equally as gross.

  8. Xinaon 29 May 2009 at 4:48 pm

    Am I the only one that thinks the lips from the picture on the right are attached to like a voodoo god? I imagine if you pulled back from that photo the tooth owner would be wearing a carved mask with feathers and perhaps shaking a stick. Anyone else feel that way? Just me?

    Nevermind.

  9. SanFranon 29 May 2009 at 5:16 pm

    Xina, I think it’s a vagina, with teeth.

  10. You Just Made My List!on 29 May 2009 at 5:27 pm

    Originally I was going to say that apparently the way to whiten your teeth is to darken your lips. I was afraid it would sound racist even though I didn’t mean it that way.

  11. SanFranon 29 May 2009 at 8:18 pm

    RACIST!

  12. Xinaon 29 May 2009 at 9:12 pm

    SanFran is very funny. =)

  13. hodanon 30 May 2009 at 10:38 am

    really Xtina? i had no idea all black lipped people were voodoo gods.

  14. joeon 31 May 2009 at 11:03 pm

    people would tell me “he doesnt even know you exist” but this fucking PROVES IT! im yours forever mother fucker. i knew i’ve always been your fave, i actually think we’re telepathically linked. do you ever sit by a window and crazy raunchy thoughts pop in to your head out of nowhere? THATS ME WATCHING YOU MOTHER FUCKER!