Jun 23 2009

Jon and Kate plus who gives a fuck!

Published by at 3:03 am under Jerks,Sucky TV

jon and kate plus eight

This is going to be a short post for exactly 3 reasons.

  1. Chicago finally has nice, warm weather and I want to sit in my yard and get drunk.
  2. I have spent the last 2 hours getting drunk in my yard.
  3. I have a suspicion that nobody gives a shit about this stupid website and my bullshit anymore.
  4. I purchased the Criterion Collection version of Bottle Rocket on DVD today and I want to watch it.
  5. Shut up!
  6. I have spent the last 2 hours getting drunk in my yard.
  7. For the record, I have a chair, it’s not like I am literally sitting in the middle of my yard drinking. Idiot.
  8. The world will be ending soon. Thanks North Korea!
  9. I’m A Celebrity Get Me Outasafghddddddddddddddddddd. Sorry I just fell asleep face-down on my computer.
  10. I hate that I even know who fucking Jon and fucking Kate are!!!

The official post begins now… Blah blah blah, I hate Jon and Kate. Kate is mean and Jon is miserable. The end.

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20 comments so far

20 comments to “Jon and Kate plus who gives a fuck!”

  1. Xinaon 23 Jun 2009 at 4:48 am

    Am I the only one that saw this coming from second one?

    I can’t be!

    Just for the record, I would joyfully murder any man that made me birth 8 children.

  2. jasonon 23 Jun 2009 at 5:15 am

    Listy, I hate you and your getting drunk ass in a chair in your yard! Not really of course but I am overcome with jealous rage as I face another day of work. I want to sit in my yard and get drunk.
    Millions of people get divorced, why should these two be special? What makes their personal failure and pain more important than anyone elses? I’m with you Listy I don’t really know who these assholes are and I don’t give a filthy rat’s ass either. I wish stories like this and Brett Favre would go the hell away. Conversely I would like to hear more about Perez Hilton getting punched in the face.

  3. A Whale's V@ginaon 23 Jun 2009 at 5:36 am

    Trust you had a BBQ. I’d also recommend Pimms next time the sun’s out. It is the balls.

  4. Peteon 23 Jun 2009 at 7:44 am

    I’m sick of them too, and I don’t even seek out “news” like that (don’t watch TV, read mags, etc). But I’d bang the stupid out of Kate.

  5. Paul in Saint Paulon 23 Jun 2009 at 9:00 am

    I rarely check my faded Facebook page, but in doing so yesterday, I found a flurry of a impassioned, not ironic, but truly impassioned, reactions to this story from high school acquaintances whom I should never have friended in the first place. (How could I know I could be subjected to hourly reports on their children’s slumber parties or how the church social went?) I cannot be friends with anyone who could react to this divorce with anything other than schadenfreude or complete ignorance. I think this divorce may call for my own divorce from Facebook. Listman, did you pass out drunk in your highfalutin’ backyard chair and wake up getting sunburned? I like to think that’s how things ended.

  6. Saraon 23 Jun 2009 at 9:11 am

    Xina, I have to admit I’ve only watched the first initial special explaining their life and the fact was Jon PLEADED with Kate to stop with the twins. “There are two back seats, 4 to a booth, the world is made for 4 people. But she wanted “just one more”

    Bitch dragged him down.

    Incidentaly this family lives like 20 minutes from me so whenever they go to local attractions like Dutch Wonderland or the Hands on House where I enjoy taking my 2 year old my ONLY CHILD the place is inundated for weeks with people LOOKING for the sextuplets

  7. You Just Made My List!on 23 Jun 2009 at 9:14 am

    Paul – I woke up, face-down and nude in my back yard. I was covered in mosquito bites, skunk spray and bird shit. Thank god a squirrel was eating my hair, otherwise I might still be out there.

  8. Tommyon 23 Jun 2009 at 9:28 am

    Jon and Kate? never heard of `em. Man downloading everything has made my life so much better

  9. rachelon 23 Jun 2009 at 12:04 pm

    Bottle Rocket is awesome.

  10. jasonon 23 Jun 2009 at 12:56 pm

    Listy, by any chance was your anus sore? And did the squirrel have a gleam in his beady little eye?

  11. You Just Made My List!on 23 Jun 2009 at 4:24 pm

    Rachel – yes, Bottle Rocket rules. I am such a super fan that I actually stayed at that motel, in the actual room from the movie. I am a nerd.

  12. You Just Made My List!on 23 Jun 2009 at 4:24 pm

    Jason – when isn’t my anus sore?

  13. hodanon 23 Jun 2009 at 6:24 pm

    i hate these people and their mutant child army.

  14. Dustinon 23 Jun 2009 at 11:28 pm

    You have your finger on the pulse of America, my friend. Keep up the good work.

  15. SanFranon 24 Jun 2009 at 9:09 pm

    Listy, I care about your nonsense… I’ve just been on vacation for a few weeks.. One week to go, and then I’m sure I’ll be back in the fold.

    Fuck off!

  16. You Just Made My List!on 25 Jun 2009 at 11:35 am

    SanFran – Fuck you and your vacation! WHEN DO I GET A VACATION?!?

  17. Marieon 01 Jul 2009 at 7:26 pm

    I just found this website and whoever writes these reviews made me laugh my ass off!! You are awesome, brutally honest, and hysterical!! I f-ing love whoever is writing these articles! Please continue!

  18. Nixon 05 Dec 2009 at 1:40 pm

    I totally enjoy your direct and honest views (Nielsen ratings be damned, they should confer with you!). Kate is a clueless dumbass. She should have watched one of their shows after it was taped. Maybe she would have questioned why that pudgy and possum eyed Jon never seems to fucking smile and looks like he’s just sick of the whole thing. I hope this divorce means they get these damn kids and their parents off my TV.

  19. Jonathanon 03 Mar 2010 at 12:50 pm

    That dumb cunt Kate ruined LOST for me last night by showing her stupid fucking face in a promo for Dancing with the “Stars”!!! DIE, KATE GOSSELIN, DIE!!!!

    PS: HOW THE FUCK IS DANCING WITH THE “STARS” A HIT SHOW??? I weep for this nation.

  20. Johannahon 08 Jun 2011 at 12:20 am

    I love love love this website. Your posts are hilarious. I found you on a search for “who the fuck are the Kardashians anyway?” and I agree that I don’t care either. I also think Kate is a total bitch and Jon is a loser. WHO cares?? I watched ten minutes of one episode and decided they are idiots and not worth my time. Bleh.