Sep 09 2009

Tyra Banks and her stupid fucking real hair!

Published by at 9:25 am under Jerks,Sucky TV,Why?!?

tyra banks real hair, who gives a shit

I am in such a rage spiral right now I can’t even think of a way to make this funny. After watching these two clips of the Tyra Banks audience literally shitting their XXL panties and giving themselves spontaneous miscarriages over the fact that Tyra is showing them her “real” hair, I am now going to pray to God to take me while I sleep tonight. Please God, kill me. No, don’t just kill me, make me explode or burst into flames! In your name I pray.

There is no way I am the same species as these cackling twats. These fuckers make the Oprah audience look like Buddhist monks! How did this happen? How did we become so stupid? Were people always this vapid and I’m just noticing now because of the internet?

Fuck everything.

Tyra explains something about her real hair while her audience fucks each other from the excitement.


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21 comments so far

21 comments to “Tyra Banks and her stupid fucking real hair!”

  1. RBoneon 09 Sep 2009 at 9:48 am

    Why pay attention to real shit that matters like science and space and health care when you can see some asshole’s real hair…on TV! Speaking of which, I wonder what Speidy is up to…and LiLo….is TMZ on right now? And does anyone have any Doritos? Or an extreme sports drink? or Arsenic?

  2. icecycle66on 09 Sep 2009 at 11:17 am

    I don’t understand anything about any of this. I do not even know the questions that should be asked to clarify my lack of understanding.

    …i have never felt so lost…

    I feel like a child wandering motherless in a busy city intersection, fearing at the same time that I am responsible for the death of my best friend.

  3. You Just Made My List!on 09 Sep 2009 at 11:26 am

    It truly is mind-boggling. I literally can’t relate to a single thing about this nonsense.

  4. Jayon 09 Sep 2009 at 1:42 pm

    The only Tyra Banks show I’d watch would be if they gave her and the audience an IQ test. Although I would probably find it more depressing than amusing.

  5. Paul in Saint Paulon 09 Sep 2009 at 4:31 pm

    C’mon. You didn’t like when Oscar parted her hair?

  6. Yours Trulyon 09 Sep 2009 at 4:33 pm

    I wonder if the carpet matches the drapes.

  7. Joeon 10 Sep 2009 at 8:11 am

    i hope tyra and jon and kate’s 8 kids all die from various horrific baked bean accidents, mainly because i hate them.

  8. Bobcatson 10 Sep 2009 at 1:21 pm

    Tyra Banks is the most self involved human being on the planet. Just watch one episode of America’s Next Top Model (yes, I watch it from time to time, fuck you). Every single episode some how turns around to point to Tyra…blah blah blah I could give a shit less. You know what, I’m a white girl with unbelievably kinky hair. I walk around with my natural hair all day and none of these screeching soccer moms flock to me!

  9. Jenon 14 Sep 2009 at 5:34 pm

    Amen Listy! (And Bobcats 🙂 Tyra is truly egomaniacal, yet people love her. What a bunch of crap!

  10. Alinkaon 09 Oct 2009 at 12:06 am

    Wow! Tyra you’ve made it, once again the attention is all on you, Congratulations… ”Look at me! Where’s the fat? My real hair, Its MY show”

    When they let people like Tyra have their own talk shows? But of course, It’s the best way for her to remind in the center of attention…

  11. Italia Roseon 05 Nov 2009 at 7:42 pm

    You guys are insane, Tyra is a beautiful person and she is the sweetest person ever..
    I guess its all a matter of opinion,
    but I love her.
    She’s simply wonderful=)
    <3 You TB.

  12. genesison 08 Nov 2009 at 7:13 pm

    o u poor thing u r the biggest fuckin hater EVER! u must be white or something if u dont understand the impact her wearing her real hair has on black women it shows us we can be beautiful without all that hair that just hides who we really are…and the lord shall strike u for begging him to take your life over your hateration…get a life stop wasting your time

  13. You Just Made My List!on 09 Nov 2009 at 1:09 am

    Genesis – Oh you poor thing and your inability to use proper english and to understand that Tyra Banks is the farthest thing from real. I will give you credit though for making up words that don’t exist. “Hateration?”

    As far as wasting my life goes, maybe you are right. This commentation really hit home and I am ashameified by the wastification of my time that I accomplitude.

  14. amandaon 17 May 2010 at 4:41 pm

    Im a hairstylist, you dont understand you couldnt relate to the fashion world.

  15. You Just Made My List!on 17 May 2010 at 4:47 pm

    Amanda – I bow to you and your superior “hairstylist” knowledge. Now get back to work, that old lady’s hair isn’t going to wash itself!

  16. Laurenon 17 Nov 2010 at 12:07 am

    Spare me the Maya Angelou bullshit!! This doesn’t have jack squat to do with ‘black women’ or natural hair this is about a full of it stupid fake as hell no talent arrogant beyond belief skank to find yet another excuse to fall in love with herself. This is almost as bad as that ridiculous that ‘are they fake or real’ show here’s a better question who besides you gives a flying fuck dumb bitch?!! Fuck Tyrant the fool she makes me sick and can eat a shit sandwich with her fat ass!

  17. Amalia27on 21 Feb 2011 at 9:15 am

    Oh my God…I’m going to pee myself from laughing so hard. Wastification…love it. Anyway ladies, use your own intelligence (except for girl who used the word hateration) to decide how you want to wear your hair. Granted, I don’t have kinky hair and can’t feel you’re pain (sarcasm)…but if I want to cut my hair, I’ll cut my hair! I’m not going to wait until a talk show host tells me that’s it’s okay to do it! How do any of you get through the day if you can’t make a decision about your own hair? And please, please please don’t start that racial bullshit with me, and how I don’t get it!

  18. paris ingeron 25 May 2011 at 9:11 pm

    Gente envidiosa , siempre habrá, lo sé Dios sólo sácame de este puto mundo que estoy viviendo, donde esta la ira, el egoismo Y PORSOBRE TODO LA ENVIDIA.
    Que tienen con Tyra Banks? Me pregunto como la odian tanto sin nisiquiera averle dicho HOLA o COMO ESTAS? Que gente tan ridícula.
    Me encanta que TYRA siempre esté en el centro de atención porque se lo merece por ser tan grande y buena en lo que hace. Amo que llame la atención, el público la ama al igual que yo.
    Quisiera que las páginas odiosas como estas llenas de …. NOSE QUE DECIR… Envidia , se cerraran alfin y nunca mas se reciclaran!!!
    En cuanto al video, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaAAmo su pelo , amo que sea asi, amo su personalidad, su actitud y AMO A TYRA BANKS.

    Ojalas nunca mas existiera gente como ustedes, putos vagabundos!!!!!!!

  19. Johnon 17 Jan 2012 at 6:05 am

    Hey Everyone,

    I agree that Tyra is very conceited and comes off as someone who thinks too highly of herself. That being said, in this case, I do have to agree with the “haterification” girl. Let’s be honest here, as Americans, we live in a predominantly white euro-centric society. Despite having a black President and some famous figures like Oprah and Will Smith, the majority of faces we see on TV and in the media are white faces. In addition, our media and our modelling industry has made it clear through their work that too them, the concept of beauty is someone who has classic caucasian features.

    In fact I watched a documentary on Youtube where designers blatantly said that the only black women they accept are the ones who look like white women dipped in chocolate i.e. have typical white facial features and hair. Because of our societal perceptions towards beauty, most black women get weaves so that they can have “white women” hair and not feel ugly. Tyra, in this show, let black women know that they can look beautiful with natural hair as well.

    I know a lot of white people are tired of the constant cries of racism and at this point are skeptical of any racial protest by people of color. To a point, I agree with all of you, a lot ( not all) of black people shout racism without a well founded reason and this must seem frustrating to even staunch anti-racist white people. However, white people must realize that there is a concept called white privilege and I’m not just talking about wealth. Even in our current era, white people hold the majority of powerful positions in this country and that’s mainly because they still make up 75%-80% of the American population. This unfortunately means that white people are considered the “normal” Americans and everyone else is considered foreign, ethnic,or exotic. In a sense, white people are invisible throughout America. What I mean by that is they can go about doing their business without a second glance. However, people of color of any other race might be looked upon by suspicion and might even be hindered by other people because of their skin color.

  20. You Just Made My List!on 17 Jan 2012 at 1:01 pm

    This has nothing to do with race, I would find Tyra Banks (and her audience) to be fucking annoying no mater what color she was.

  21. Bobbyon 10 Apr 2012 at 11:46 am

    I would rather have 3 back-to-back root canals without novacaine then watch a show with Tyra Banks on it. She’s a stupid, arrogant, bitch. With her non-stop “holier than thou” attitude she wouldn’t give you the time of day unless camera’s were on her.