Feb 11 2010

Kelly Ripa!

Published by at 3:15 am under I Don't Get It,Jerks,Sucky TV

Kelly Ripa is annoying

For the first time since I was in high school I have a TV in my bedroom. It is thanks to this TV that I have been exposed to Kelly Ripa and her parade of enthusiastic nonsense!

Regis Philbin is either retarded or the most patient human on the planet. I feel like you could stick that man in a garbage bag filled with mosquitoes and he would keep on smiling and telling stories about having lunch with Charles Nelson Reilly or whatever the hell he talks about.

Kelly Ripa is that horrible kind of woman who thinks, and knows, she is oh so adorable and no matter how fucking annoying she is people fall all over themselves to love her. She could stand up on that desk and explode diarrhea all over Regis while eating a kitten and the audience of sassy hairs would giggle and hoot like a bunch of mindless idiots. The worst thing is that if I ever met Kelly Ripa I would probably fall under her whore spell (3 whore references in 4 days!) like a zombie. I’m trying to convince myself otherwise, but I would probably smile and thank her for blasting shit all over my face too.

Why is Kelly Ripa constantly shooting poop on people?

Be Sociable, Share!

40 comments so far

40 comments to “Kelly Ripa!”

  1. Peteon 11 Feb 2010 at 7:28 am

    Sorry, my King, I cannot join you in disparaging Kelly because I’m already under her whore spell. If her rack were a little bigger I’d be completely smitten–so there’s a chance I might break the evil enchantment.

  2. SanFranon 11 Feb 2010 at 11:06 am

    Would you hate-fuck her, Listy?

    Rumor has it she’s into that kinda thing.

  3. You Just Made My List!on 11 Feb 2010 at 11:53 am

    It would be my pleasure to have angry, hate filled sex with the Ripper

  4. icecycle66on 11 Feb 2010 at 12:31 pm

    Is hate sex the one where you make them lay in a tub of ice with only a belt around their neck and a door knob to keep their head above melting water for a half an hour before gettin’ it on?

  5. Jonathanon 11 Feb 2010 at 4:06 pm

    If you really want to be horrified, look for bikini pictures of her and check out her distended navel. It looks like her small intenstines are trying to escape from her abdomen!

  6. You Just Made My List!on 11 Feb 2010 at 4:16 pm

    Jonathan – Yeah, I’ve seen those pics. Looks like a baby penis.

  7. ffafon 11 Feb 2010 at 10:42 pm

    Hahaha, great post! To think that you actually thought about quitting the list is pretty scary. Keep finding fun new things to hate, it’s great.

  8. mp805on 12 Feb 2010 at 3:25 am

    This has nothing to do with this topic. I thought you just made my list was a bitter lesbian chic or a crazy cat lady.I guess youre a dude, the Tom Lykis kinda guy. Probably just as attractive. You have some good points mostly pig headed.You do make me laugh (some times)

  9. Andraon 12 Feb 2010 at 6:43 am

    As someone who has read every post (some more than once cause they are so fucking HIlarious) I am pretty sure listy has mentioned his penis, Scrotum and balls more than one time. Seems like that would have blown the “bitter lesbian chick” theory for you MP805. Just sayin…..

  10. You Just Made My List!on 12 Feb 2010 at 8:48 am

    mp805 – Yes, I look EXACTLY like Tom Lykis.

    Andra – My penis and balls look EXACTLY like Tom Lykis.

  11. jasonon 20 Feb 2010 at 10:49 am

    i love kelly ripa. i think shes cool – and shes always given credit for her success to everyone else, like her personal assistants, stage crew….oh, im under the whore spell, too. dammit.

  12. You Just Made My List!on 20 Feb 2010 at 11:38 am

    Jason – The force is strong with this one.

  13. Andyon 04 Mar 2010 at 8:29 pm

    Kelly Ripa is a cunt. She should get ovarian cancer. I hate that douchebag.

  14. Kimon 26 Mar 2010 at 8:40 am

    I’m SO Glad That Its Just NOT Been Me That Wants To VOMIT At That F-A-K-E Replacement!!! (Couldn’t Those Producers Find An HUMBLE Applicant–Instead Of “RIPA-RIP”– The Cloned KathyLeeGifford??? After Seeing There Are 7 Sites So Far—I See That It Is NOT My Imagination About The Way She Comes Across!!!
    Count Me IN…K.R. STINKS!!!

  15. midgeon 24 May 2010 at 4:24 pm

    For a looong time, I haven’t been able to pinpoint what is wrong with her body. I think I’ve got it, firstly, she is absolute skin and bones. There is no shape to her body what so ever, her flat chest just exacerbates the situation. Her teeny tiny clothes seem to swim on her pre-pubescent frame. All this only makes me more pissed with her friggin’ quirkiness. What a wierdo.
    She needs Regis.

  16. robinon 27 Jul 2010 at 7:45 am

    why the hell do people think her arms are so great. she looks like a 12 year old boy and every show she makes sure she has on sleeveless and flexes. there is nothing sexy about her. she makes me so sick i can’t understand how her spic husband has sex with a stick figure. must be something wrong with him too

  17. You Just Made My List!on 27 Jul 2010 at 7:49 am

    Robin – Why did you have to go and ruin it with a racial slur? Dumb.

  18. Greg Hodgeson 15 Oct 2010 at 1:09 am

    This thing is so fucking annoying it’s not even funny!. great funny post!. They need to bring back Kathy Lee she was real.

  19. Unnecessary Retardedon 02 Jan 2011 at 2:29 am

    Heres the deal. This broad has been infecting my life since I was a small child and my mother would let me stay home from school on random days that she had off too and I would watch her watch All My Children.

    Kelly Rippa sure had a promising career. From my excellent critical thinking skills-even at such a young age- I figured that she was the niece of someone on that retched show. She had black hair and a nose ring.. Does anyone else remember this?

    ahh I think we are all a little at ease and happy that the only thing life gave her is the ability to change an old man’s diapers and hold a coffee cup..

    cheers to the rant. I can’t stand chicks that think they are the ants pants.. and the last thing the world needs is another talk show host.

  20. TV w/o Pityon 12 Feb 2011 at 7:59 am

    I hate that no talent piece of twig. On the website Television Without Pity there are some posters who love everything she does. She’s a hack of an interviewer and the only reason she has a job is because she sucks it up to that asshole Gelman.

    I hate how she tells long boring stories and even brings up her unemployed loser husband as the hunk from heaven.

    I think the show will be cancelled once Regis leaves because she has nothing worthwhile to add.

  21. Amalia27on 21 Feb 2011 at 8:58 am

    She has transformed into a little elf boy! When she’s not wearing her grandmother’s blousy tops, she’s wearing clothes showing off her skinny man arms, stick legs, ribs, and rock hard flat chest. Watch the show and see how many times she looks into the camera to watch herself. You know she was at home the night before looking into her bathroom mirror and practicing how to sip from a coffee cup while trying to look sexy. In normal houses you hear the mattress and bed squeaking when two people are doing it, in her house it sounds like Fred Flinstone working at the gravel pit. Serious, can her husband really enjoy it? Must suck to sleep with an ironing board that’s stronger than you. And oh, Kelly the belly button…really? Let the magazines get their way about airbrushing it. It scared my children the last time they saw it. There are just somethings about our bodies we shouldn’t be proud of. Is it another child trying to get out?

  22. sarahon 03 May 2011 at 8:06 am

    I thought KL Gifford was the most annoying person…but congratulations KR has surpassed her…didn’t think it could be done

  23. Jennon 23 May 2011 at 8:41 am

    Ever notice how Ripa constantly (I mean every damn time) starts talking about herself and/or something that happened to her or something she did once, etc. before she ever interviews the guests? Ugh! She takes every situation and makes it about her. She is so annoying! You can tell she thinks she is so hot but she has the body of a ten year old boy and huge teeth. lol

  24. Joleneon 22 Aug 2011 at 7:51 pm

    I agree, she has passed K L Gifford in the annoying department. The woman (or should i say little boy) is the most irritating thing on television…and I hope once Regis goes, her career will be over.

  25. Beccaon 06 Sep 2011 at 8:45 pm

    No doubt in my mind once Regis bids farewell the talentless Ripa will be history. She has demonstrated recently that she has no idea who her audience really is. Disrespecting Regis with the constant eye-rolling and “oh look at the old guy” routine has worn thin. I’m not sure if that is a “network ploy” to distance herself from the “old Guy” in order to take the helm….but she neither has the talent or the humility to carry the show or the audience.

  26. markdon 02 Nov 2011 at 8:05 am

    how the crap did she get on that show? Gelman fell in love with her protruding naval? I really feel sorry for the Reg, he’s immune to the whore spell but stuck in the gravitional pull of the black hole, waiting until 18Nov to reach escape velocity.

  27. Bobbyon 10 Apr 2012 at 12:14 pm

    Kelly Rippa disgusts me almost as much as that skank amazon woman Tyra Banks with her men’s size 14 horse feet.
    A friend of mine recently counted the numer of times she looked at herself on the studio monitor…17 times in one minute!!! If you watch closley when a guest is talking to her (if they can get a work in edgewise) you’ll see she’s not listening to a word they’re saying and she’s looking at herself on the monitor. Then she’ll fix her hair or straighten out her dress right after doing it.
    It would also be nice to see less of her (strongly suspected to be) bisexual husband on there with his stupid shit-eating grin pasted on his face.
    She would be a very attractive woman if she could get over her anorexia nervosa (that she covers up by saying she works out a lot) and replace those 2 mosquito bites on her chest that she calls breasts with a nice set of knockers.

  28. Karenon 27 Apr 2012 at 8:28 am

    I have never seen a television personality look at them selves on the studio monitor as many times as Kelly Ripa does. What is up with that? And she’s so obvious doing it. Is she really that stuck on herself? She’s a pretty woman she just needs to put on about 50 pounds and get a breast augmentation….
    She sure loves to hear herself talk, she runs right over her guests in conversation. I do think her husband is cute I just wish he’d get over that greasy looking plastered down hairstyle. I’ve read in numerous places that he’s bisexual, does anyone know if thats true?

  29. ebethon 29 Apr 2012 at 1:24 am

    Kelly Ripa reminds me of a starving Oompa Loompa.
    What I don’t understand is why the TV Land Awards show chose her to be the host this year…she is totally irrelevant to TV Land network. She’s never had an old show on the network, she doesn’t have any new shows on the network, so why choose her??

  30. consuelaon 18 May 2012 at 1:24 pm

    I hate those commercials with her surrounded by hundreds of cupcakes – as if she would ever eat one!
    I can’t understand why an appliance company would pick her – I’m pretty sure she doesn’t do her own laundry.

  31. lynnon 31 May 2012 at 9:17 am

    She hurts my brain.. she hurts millions of brains..
    Oh, I don’t want to hate her, but she sucks the
    life outta me and it’s painful to hear her, see her,
    the shallow mouse has no compassion for others,
    if she did she would sew up her mouth and wear
    a bag over her head..

  32. Bobbyon 15 Jun 2012 at 12:24 pm

    That potruding belly button is gross…it looks like an umbilical hernia or something. We counted her looking at herself on the monitor 46 times in one minute.!!!!
    She must be “doing” Gelman or something to stay on that show.
    And her unemployed bisexual husband is not the hunk he thinks he is with his overly whitened teeth.

  33. Janiceon 09 Jul 2012 at 2:26 pm

    Too bad Ann Curry didn’t take Kelly Rippa with her. Although I do like Ann, she just wasn’t suited for that anchor spot.
    The posters above are right, it’s incredible how many times Kelly Rippa looks at herself on the studio monitor, it’s like every 5 seconds or so, and she’s very obvious about it. She must be a very vain woman.
    She’d be as pretty woman if she’d gain a little weight, she reminds of Karen Carpenter.

  34. Christineon 14 Nov 2012 at 11:39 am

    I don’t dislike many people, but Kelly Ripa is so annoying. She’s all sunshine and so saccharin. Too blonde, too perfect, unrelate-able. Bring back Kathy G!

  35. Christineon 14 Nov 2012 at 11:45 am

    Come to think of it, I feel the same way about Katie Couric. Her cheshire smile, her smooth, measured way of speaking, never getting too excited, always maintaining that calm exterior…drive me nuts. Get real.

  36. Michele Kojion 14 Jun 2013 at 8:56 am

    Why would anyone design a site for hate? I like Kelly Ripa and I also like Kathie Lee Gifford and Hoda. No arguements. I can like whoever I want. You can hate whoever you want as well, but what a f*****g waste of time!

  37. You Just Made My List!on 14 Jun 2013 at 1:57 pm

    Then why would you waste your time reading it and leaving a comment? Why do you waste your important time like that?

  38. a$$holeon 14 Dec 2013 at 11:04 pm

    She looks like she has a terminator mask stretched over a skeleton head. Her small hands make her husbands pecker look big.

  39. Billy Sweeneyon 04 Feb 2014 at 9:19 am

    I can make money by hating or liking people, celebrity and or otherwise? FUCK ME! I hate approximately 99% of my fellow human race. 98% of people i have to associate with on a daily basis and half of my friends. What The FUCK!? I wanna get paid. So. If your a computer whiz and can set me up a site where all I have to do is explain my disdain for certain miscreants please contact me. We can make millions. Sure we’ll start with pop culture… Then i’s on to my world where I’ll introduce an audience to certain ass holes and we can all move forward spewing our hatred for these brain dead parasitic fuck junks. All I’m saying……. I mean if…… Okay, the Kardasicunts were already rich beyond belief. Flush enough to make an athletic Bruce Jenner streamline his own face… I hope he at least molested a few of his step daughters… See, I told you I was full of hate. I digress… So a filthy family that is honored and adored by millions makes MILLIONS. What about the haters? There is obviously an audience for the hate… I say bring it on and let it begin with me. how could society move forward until we let the world know THAT,——— Miley Cyrus has a bellybutton to CROTCH ratio that has never been witnessed in human life forms…… sweendog67@verizon.net Let’s make a billion dollars. Feed a shit ton of kids, light cigars with hundred dollar bills and retire with nothing more than swim trunks, wife beaters, with just enough cash left over for bananas and milk to fuel us into our dying days.

  40. Billy Sweeneyon 04 Feb 2014 at 9:33 am

    For GODS SAKE did anyone mention that kelly ripa has a fucking finger sticking out of her bellybutton?????? SEE! just like Miley Cyrus and her sickening bellybutton to crotch ratio…… These must be aliens of some sort…. I feel another conspiracy coming on….. I don’t want to hear any complaints about my punctuation, spelling errors, or capitalization… Like my brain, my keyboard has one of its own.