Jun 24 2010
Comcast!
I’m writing this from my phone because Comcast is shoving the internet up its own ass! I’ve been without an internet connection for over 14 hours now and it’s seriously cramping my style. How will I keep up with every single cute thing my Facebook friends’ kids say? Don’t even get me started on an ENTIRE DAY without porn! I hate you Comcast, I want my porn back!
OMG you won’t even know what your 3rd grade teacher had for breakfast!!!!
How about updating yourself to ‘Listy 2005′ and getting a 3G phone? That way you’re *always on* which your Facebook lifestyle now requires.
Holy shit. The twins’ T-ball game got rained out, again, and Michelle is at her wit’s end! Nate wishes this whole World Cup thing would go away so the news would make more time for baseball. Steph is thinking about Panera for lunch today, and she cannot BELIEVE what happened on The Bachelorette. Also, Michael reached a new level in Mafia Wars, and Sergio just sent you A Warm Hug from Pooh-Bear™.
There’s your facebook update.
I’ll work on the porn later. I’m thinking naughty nurses for today.
Poor bastard…I can’t imagine a day without my beloved porn. What does one do without instant access to chesty Japanese schoolgirls giving each other octopus enemas?
Jeff – I have an iPhone, but writing an entire post on it sounds too annoying to attempt. I did my best.
Paul – I was JUST talking about naughty nurses last night.
Bill – I have had to resort to using my private stash of porn saved on my computer. It just feels wrong though.
um. why aren’t we FB friends??
never mind. you probably won’t be able to read this comment anyway.
I’m so sorry for your loss
Sorry for the trouble. Send us an email. We will assist.
Mark Casem
Comcast Corp.
National Customer Operations
We_can_help@cable.comcast.com
Mark, how’s he supposed to send an email when his connection is down?
IT’S A TRAP!
Who cares about the stupid fucking World Cup??? Can you please write a post about how awful and boring soccer is?
That’s too bad cuz I just sent you a graphic video of what happened when me and two of my girlfriends had too much to drink. I guess you’ll just have to miss that one.
Listy – Comcast has been on MY list for 5 fucking years now! Our supposed “Xfinity” premium service (that we pay fucking $290/month for) is FUCKING GARBAGE!!!!!!! We bundle everything with these mouth breathers and our service is spotty at best. On-Demand with them is the worst though…that goes out EVERY god-damned day.
I tried to contact our city planner here to get them to respond to Google’s RFI for Google Fiber (basically it will deliver speeds up to 1GB per second,insanely fast, in selected towns in the US) here. But apparently I needed to go give multiple blow-jobs, hand-jobs and anal to the entire city council! I was up for it…my husband not so much.
Erica: you pay how much for your monthly at-home entertainment and connectivity?
Do you live some place where it snows every fucking day and you can’t go outside for fear of being shot through the heart, and you’re to blame darlin’, you give love a bad name?
Ditch that shit and go outside or something.
SanFran – yup, I give love a BAAD name! The main reason for the exorbitant rate (I don’t deny it sounds insane) is we have everything bundled…phone, internet, tv. And with 4 HD DVR’s, plus the upgraded T3 speed access point router it is a mother fucker. We run some Xbox testing here too so we need shitloads of bandwidth. But the other option for our needs is a dedicated line and that would be about $5000K per month for a T3. That aint happenin anytime soon!
But I will take to the streets on my penny farthing wings of gold this summer…I can promise you that!
Rachel – Are you sure you are ready for the commitment?
abso-effing-lootly!!!!! fb me!
Listy…I want to be your fucking FB friend too! I promise lots of updates about my bowels, my children’s bowels and my dog’s bowels. All things that should be irresistible to you…:)
If I don’t know the email address you use on FB I can’t find you.
Listy – it is the same as my Yahoo email just @gmail.com
What? I thought you loved reading all the cute things my kids said on FB. I’m gonna go slit my wrists now.
Listy…I want to be your fucking FB friend too! I promise lots of updates about my bowels, my children’s bowels and my dog’s bowels. All things that should be irresistible to you…:)
Melanie – What’s Fucking FaceBook? It sounds like a site I should be a member of. Is it like FB but with more fucking?