Nov 11 2008

I’m taking a day off!

Published by at 4:20 am under Jerks

Sorry, I need a day off from bitching. Well, really it’s just because I ran out of time today but tomorrow I will complain extra hard!

Feel free to comment with anything that’s on your list but just don’t make it funnier than my posts!

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15 comments so far

15 comments to “I’m taking a day off!”

  1. Weirdoon 11 Nov 2008 at 11:37 am

    I don’t have a list. I’m not cool enough to have a list. I have a blog in which I bitch about stuff that I started yesterday because I was bored. But I don’t have a list.

  2. Lon 11 Nov 2008 at 1:09 pm

    Alright, I’ve got one. Actually, I have several, but I’ll try to limit it to my most recent annoyance.

    Does anyone else hate it when people get off the escalator and IMMEDIATELY stop? Can’t you step off to the side and then try to get a grip on your surroundings? Those stairs don’t stop moving just because you do, genius.

    The idiots who can’t seem to keep walking once they step off the escalator are in the same vein as the assholes who simply CANNOT wait for everyone else to get off the elevator before they start piling their piggy selves in. Hello, news? THERE IS NO CONTEST TO SEE WHO CAN BE THE FIRST ON THE ELEVATOR….so give it a rest, will you?
    I hate playing the part of the disgruntled jackass who inevitably has to force her way, pushing and shoving, passed these assholes while they’re desperately trying to get on the elevator before…before what? The elevator doors close and you’re left behind to wait another 5 minutes? Relax…the boat’s not going anywhere without you.

  3. Arthason 11 Nov 2008 at 1:12 pm

    How about brown boots. The sole fact that the two words alliterate makes me sick. I like boots and I like brown as a color (unlike green that son of a bitch) but brown boots make me want to hurt someone. Maybe they are so shitty because they are the same color as shit, maybe it’s because they are just another color that’s meant to be trendy. But the main reason they suck so hard is because the more you hate them, the more often you see them.
    Satan created them in order to piss men off and feel women good about themselves, that bastard. Women who wear brown boots are evil, stupid, mindless, have no character and are soulless whores.

  4. You Just Made My List!on 11 Nov 2008 at 1:19 pm

    L, yes these people are horrible. I hate it when people are unaware of their surroundings and think the world ceases to exist 1 inch from their fat faces.

    Arthas, I never had a problem with brown boots but I appreciate your passion. I can relate to getting overly upset over trivial things and I encourage all others to do the same.

    Thanks for picking up the slack for my lazy ass!

  5. Lon 11 Nov 2008 at 1:27 pm

    And thanks for giving the rest of us a chance to bitch!

  6. You Just Made My List!on 11 Nov 2008 at 1:33 pm

    Weirdo, welcome to the world of professional complaining!

  7. SanFranon 11 Nov 2008 at 1:35 pm

    Great – you lack of bitchin’ today means my productivity is going to skyrocket.. SKYROCKET, I say!!!

    Thanks for nothing.

  8. Creature of Habiton 11 Nov 2008 at 3:36 pm

    Yes- L! Good one. It’s the same assholes that walk through a door in front of you (without bothering to hold it) and then just stand there on the other side, looking around…. doorways are for walking THRU – keep it it moving!

    I’m always the disgruntled ass, much to my husband’s entertainment…..

  9. You Just Made My Anus!on 11 Nov 2008 at 10:17 pm

    People who drink milk with ice.

    A White Russian with ice is ok. But a glass of plain milk with ice is just gross. What the hell are these people thinking? Won’t the ice melt and make watered down milk? Eww! It reminds me of doing dishes. You know, when you rinse a plate or something and there’s that cloudy milk water. BlechHHHH!!!!!! Milk is plenty cold on it’s own without ice. Unless, of course, you don’t refrigerate it. But that’s even worse.

    Ice-milk drinkers, you just made my anus. Thanks for grossing me out.

  10. You Just Made My List!on 11 Nov 2008 at 10:39 pm

    Anus, nice call. That does suck major ass! Milk is just kind of gross anyway. It reminds me of something similar that I hate… Drinking water through a straw. I love water but as soon as you suck it through a straw it just becomes sad. FUCK OFF water through a straw!

  11. SanFranon 11 Nov 2008 at 11:15 pm

    have you ever drunk bailey’s from a shoe?

  12. MalaSuerteon 12 Nov 2008 at 5:00 am

    quickies from my list–

    -The new awesome trend on the interstates at night of people flashing their high-beams while passing semis.
    Thanks, assface, for letting me know you’re passing by BLINDING ME.

    -Officers that tell you they HAVE to write you a ticket.
    No you effin don’t.

    -Ashton Kutcher.

  13. Patrickoon 12 Nov 2008 at 11:01 am

    Chicks that wear loud ass clicky shoes, and then walk around like the own the fucking world.

  14. You Just Made My List!on 12 Nov 2008 at 11:12 am

    Funny. You guys are better at this than me. I quit.

  15. SanFranon 12 Nov 2008 at 12:54 pm

    MaleSuerte: YES… the women in the office upstairs (a PR firm), tromp around in their office all fucking day with some sort of hard-heeled shoe. When they moved in, I graciously asked them to be mindful of the fact that my edit suite is directly below them, and this ancient brick & timber building has solid oak floors throughout. Needless to say, they need near-constant reminders – and when things are quiet, I’ll pump up the volume in the 5.1 surround system in the edit suite before heading out for lunch, and put some Tribe Called Quest on or whatever. Cypress Hill is always a good choice. Makes their work more difficult, I trust.

    I don’t know what it is though – do they not notice the amount of fucking racket they are making with each step? Can that be comforting to them? I mean, it’s LOUD!

    I’m going to start traveling with a cordless saws-all, and just cut heels off when I see them. Besides, I find high-heel shoes to be utterly unattractive. “Fuck me pumps” we called them in college.