Mar 18 2009
Wisconsin’s new slogan “Live Like You Mean It!”
I always thought Indiana had the worst state slogan with their lame “Crossroads of America,” which basically means “Nothing to See Here, Keep Driving.” Well Indiana, you should thank Wisconsin for announcing today that their new official slogan is “Live Like You Mean It!”
I just about fell off my chair* when I heard this hilarious news. Have you ever been to Wisconsin? Has the Wisconsin Board of Tourism ever been to Wisconsin?!? Wisconsin is not a bad place, in fact I like a lot of things about Wisconsin, but it’s hardly a seize-the-day kind of place. Maybe seize-the-nachos and beer. Carpe diem? Nope.
Now if you are from Wisconsin and think I am unfairly categorizing Wisconsinites as “fat” please do not waste your breath. I have lived in the Midwest my entire life so I know firsthand what a bunch of fat fucks we (not me) are. We like our meat, we like our cheese and we like our beer. Then we like some more meat, some more cheese and 6 more beers. If you give us a salad it fucking better be covered in cheese and bacon or someone is getting hurt.
Back to the topic… how exactly are people from Wisconsin meant to live? What if they don’t “mean it,” should they give up hope and sit around getting fat and drunk? Hey, that sounds a lot like Wisconsin! Perhaps a better slogan would be something like “Mean to Live but Have Another Beer Instead.”
*gold-plated throne
