Tag Archive 'lil wayne'

Feb 10 2010

Over the mantle flat screen TVs!

flat screen tv over the mantle

Hey thanks for inviting me over to stare at your ceiling for 4 hours! What’s that you say, you want to play Guitar Hero? Sure, let me just go ahead and lie on my back on your dirty floor so I can see the TV. Perfect.

You know, just because you see something on MTV’s Cribs doesn’t mean you have to try and recreate it in your Dorito-covered trailer. As a general rule, if you see some dumb rapper do something on Cribs it’s best to do the opposite. Sure, it might seem cool to have an actual panda bear as your butler, but after the money is gone who’s going to feed that thing? God, I would pay so much money to watch a hungry panda chase Lil Wayne around some shitty, beige, Atlanta McMansion. Lil would try to hide behind his pool table only to immediately regret buying the world’s only perfectly clear pool table made from Swarovski crystals. Go get your Wayne on, panda.

Sorry, I got distracted by that fantasy. When did placing your TV at eye level become the exception rather than the rule? Plus, I can think of no better place for your $1,500 TV than over your hot, dirty, smoke-barfing fireplace. I keep my computer in the oven.

16 responses so far

Sep 26 2008

Lil’ Wayne for not being embarrassed to do this on Saturday Night Live!

When I saw Lil’ Wayne’s amazing guitar solo this past Saturday on SNL I just about peed my pants with excitement. This has got to be the saddest/funniest moment in the history of the guitar. You’ve got to love that nobody in his band had the balls to say, “Lil’, what’s the fucking deal with the guitar solo? Stop and never ever ever do that again.”

His guitar playing is so horrific it almost makes the rest of this crap song sound better. Doe anyone remember when music was good? I don’t. If you have not already seen this, please enjoy the world’s worst guitar solo!

7 responses so far